Self Maid

In today’s world, everyone is on their own journey when it comes to money, success, and personal growth. Yet, one toxic habit keeps resurfacing in conversations online and offline: pocket-watching.

If you’re not familiar with the term, pocket-watching simply means obsessing over someone else’s money. What they earn, how they spend it, or how they choose to invest. At first, it might sound harmless, but in reality, it’s one of the most counterproductive and loser-like behaviours you can engage in.

When you spend time worrying about someone else’s finances, it usually reflects your own insecurities. Instead of focusing on building your own wealth and opportunities, you’re wasting mental energy comparing yourself to others. Jealousy disguised as “curiosity” won’t get you anywhere. It just keeps you stuck.

Pocket-watching doesn’t always show up as open jealousy. Sometimes it comes in the form of nosy questions like, “So… how much do you make?,” “How much is your rent?,” or “How much was that purse?”

Not only are these questions intrusive and gauche, but they also make you look insecure and socially unaware. Money is a personal subject, and unless someone chooses to share, pressing them about their finances is tacky. It signals that you’re more interested in measuring yourself against others than minding your own business.

The harsh truth? Winners don’t have time to care about what other people do with their money. Successful people know that time and energy are their most valuable resources. They don’t squander those resources by gossiping about what others have. While you’re busy counting someone else’s bills, or interrogating them about prices, those of a higher rank are focused on growing their income streams, developing skills, and enjoying life.

“She doesn’t deserve that job,” “If I had that kind of money, I’d do better.” Pocket-watching often leads to bitterness. This negativity creates a toxic mindset that pushes opportunities, relationships, and growth away. And when you pair that with prying questions about what people earn or spend, you just look bitter and entitled.

Money Conversations Should Be About Growth, Not judgement.

There’s nothing wrong with discussing money in a way that helps everyone improve. Talking about investing, saving, budgeting, and building multiple streams of income can be empowering. But pocket-watching isn’t financial literacy. It’s financial envy. One builds community and knowledge. The other tears people down.

Instead of worrying about who’s making what (or how much their skincare routine costs) redirect that energy and focus on your own earnings. When you focus on your own growth, you stop caring about how someone else spends their money because you’ll be too busy securing your own success.

At the end of the day, trying to get a sense of the finances of those around you distracts you from your own potential and makes others uncomfortable. If you truly want to move up in the world, stop counting other people’s riches and start building your own.